Ship of Theseus

even the seasons are airy metaphors      objects are not nouns      non-temporal      i shouldn’t use them as clocks      maybe solipsism is real      solicitousness shows how idealists deny things     no one loves anyone      i’m not in the habit of saving people      i would only jump

off the plank if the breaker’s milk promised to let me drown without knowing i let you die

we make children      to pretend we are someone better      there are hands on my body

that multiply      even when i resist giving them money      they pinch away the cornea of my eye and let it snap back      they try to convince me it’s bubble gum      the word controlling is a verb

a troll      who cons      ll      is a picture      not two identical letters      of a plank

i have a water phobia      i would rather spread my legs wide open      to scale lighthouses      when they pierce the sky      clouds turn into phlegm      lighthouses should be built upside down      men should erect them internally      i would rather hold onto walls than swim to the next ledge

epinephrine has drowned me more than once      the tide’s belly is permanently sealed

my mother is turning the wrong way      she is stuck on the tactility of words

something tells me i can jump the plank      and build a bridge under the sea      a bridge      solid      like a pair of virgin legs      beans hold their breath when i close my purse      i don’t have money      or a bike to balance myself on      but it’s hard to create impressionable bridges without money

if i were to replace all the planks of my ship      is it still the ship i was born in

it has more to do with how the wood circles into a mother’s arms      planks are stained with body cells      the sea’s salt crumbles wood      licks fingerprints      if i built another ship with the same planks      i would hope to make a better part of me

is there anyone you know who wants to die

 

Annie Blake is an Australian writer, thinker and researcher. She is a wife and mother of five children. Her main interests include psychoanalysis, metaphysics and metacognition. She is currently interested in arthouse writing which explores the surreal nature and symbolic meanings of unconscious material through nocturnal and diurnal dreams and fantasies. Her writing is a dialogue between unconscious material and conscious thoughts and synchronicity. You can visit her on annieblakethegatherer.blogspot.com.au and https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100009445206990.